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The World's Spammiest Funny Jokes

This appeared after somebody spammed the NG with an ad offering to sell "The World's Funniest Dirty Jokes" at a dollar a pop.

The World's Spammiest Funny Jokes

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LaCroix: "Six feet of dirt, Nicolas, *six* feet! Five isn't enough to keep a live spammer in its grave."

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Nicolas: "Okay, I'll bite. Why did the spammer cross the road?"

LaCroix: "It doesn't matter. I saw to it that he never made it all the way across."

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A spammer walks into a bar and sits down next to this gorgeous brunette. "Hey, honey," he says, "you wanna hear a dirty joke?"

So Janette turns to him, bites his throat and drinks his blood. Then she tosses his dried corpse aside. "I am *not* 'honey!'" she says.

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Three traveling salesmen--a Hindu, a Catholic and a spammer--show up at a farm one miserable winter night. When they ask the farmer for a place to sleep, the farmer says "I only have enough room in here for two of you; the third will have to sleep in the barn. I know it's snowing and freezing out there, but it's the best I can do."

The Hindu graciously volunteers to sleep in the barn, but after a moment there's a knock at the farmhouse door. The farmer opens the door and sees the Hindu standing there. "There is a cow in your barn," he explains, "and I feel unworthy to sleep under the same roof with that sacred animal."

So the Catholic goes out to the barn, but once again, a moment later there's a knock at the door. The farmer opens the door and sees the Catholic standing there. "I saw all of the animals gathered around the manger," he explains, "and because it reminded me of how our savior was born in a stable, I felt unworthy and guilty to intrude upon such a holy scene."

When he hears that the spammer goes out to the barn. The Hindu and the Catholic high-five one another. "Jeeze," the Hindu says, "can you believe he fell for that schtick?"

Then there's yet another knock at the door. The farmer opens the door and sees Screed standing there. "Lowest blood I ever tasted, mate!" he says in gratitude.

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Did you hear the one about the spammer who hit this newsgroup twice?

No, of course you didn't--because none of them live long enough to do that.

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What's gross stupidity? Twelve dozen spammers.

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How many spammers does it take to screw up a lightbulb?

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Last modified: April 10, 2006